A friend brought this to my attention. I've seen it before, but it's so very good, it's worth reviving.
Dr. Laura Schlessinger is a US radio personality who dispenses advice to people who call in to her radio show. Recently, she said that, as an observant Orthodox Jew, homosexuality is an abomination according to Leviticus 18:22, and cannot be condoned under any circumstance.
The following is an open letter to Dr. Laura penned by a US resident, which was posted on the Internet.
Dear Dr. Laura:
Thank you for doing so much to educate people regarding God's Law. I have learned a great deal from your show, and try to share that knowledge with as many people as I can. When someone tries to defend the homosexual lifestyle, for example, I simply remind them that Leviticus 18:22 clearly states it to be an abomination. End of debate.
I do need some advice from you, however, regarding some of the other specific laws and how to follow them.
1. When I burn a bull on the altar as a sacrifice, I know it creates a pleasing odour for the Lord - Lev.1:9. The problem is my neighbours. They claim the odour is not pleasing to them. Should I smite them?
2. I would like to sell my daughter into slavery, as sanctioned in Exodus 21:7. In this day and age, what do you think would be a fair price for her?
3. I know that I am allowed no contact with a woman while she is in her period of menstrual cleanliness - Lev.15:19-24. The problem is, how do I tell? I have tried asking, but most women take offence.
4. Lev. 25:44 states that I may indeed possess slaves, both male and female, provided they are purchased from neighbouring nations. A friend of mine claims that this applies to Mexicans, but not Canadians. Can you clarify? Why can't I own Canadians?
5. I have a neighbour who insists on working on the Sabbath. Exodus 35:2 clearly states he should be put to death. Am I morally obligated to kill him myself?
6. A friend of mine feels that even though eating shellfish is an abomination - Lev. 11:10, it is a lesser abomination than homosexuality. I don't agree. Can you settle this?
7. Lev. 21:20 states that I may not approach the altar of God if I have a defect in my sight. I have to admit that I wear reading glasses. Does my vision have to be 20/20, or is there some wiggle room here?
8. Most of my male friends get their hair trimmed, including the hair around their temples, even though this is expressly forbidden by Lev.19:27. How should they die?
9. I know from Lev. 11:6-8 that touching the skin of a dead pig makes me unclean, but may I still play football if I wear gloves?
10. My uncle has a farm. He violates Lev. 19:19 by planting two different crops in the same field, as does his wife by wearing garments made of two different kinds of thread (cotton/polyester blend). He also tends to curse and blaspheme a lot. Is it really necessary that we go to all the trouble of getting the whole town together to stone them? -Lev.24:10-16. Couldn't we just burn them to death at a private family affair like we do with people who sleep with their in-laws? (Lev.20:14)
I know you have studied these things extensively, so I am confident you can help. Thank you again for reminding us that God's word is eternal and unchanging.
Your devoted disciple and adoring fan,
Jack
Wednesday, November 5, 2008
Republican Freeloaders
Who are these 'hard working Americans' who are so upset about paying taxes? They keep saying, "Why should I have to pay more when I've worked hard to be successful"
I'm getting really impatient with this blindness.
I'm in or near the top level of income in this country, the level that might have taxes raised. I have always worked hard for every nickel I earned, and as a single parent since my kids were babies, proudly provided for my family. I went from being broke to being okay, becoming comfortable. But what's this about taxes?
I am, you are or will be, successful bcz of free schools&teachers, roads & bridges, our military, you know the rest. People who scratch by can't pay. I know. I was one of them. Because I got the benefits of being an American citizen, and because of the graduated income tax, I stopped scratching by. Now, I can afford to pay my way.
And I want to. Thank you, America.
No, I'm not rich. My taxes might not change at all. But if I get more successful, and I might, I'll happily pull out that checkbook and pay my taxes.
Those are my roads and bridges and rivers and that's my air. Those people hurt by Katrina, fighting overseas, are my countrymen.
I'm sick of corporate welfare and theft, the military industrial lobbyist corporate complex bleeding us white -- and I'm sick of the people who back up that corruption selling the lie that you 'should hang on to what you work hard for,' when they're really trying to get you to vote for them -- and you're foolish enough to think you're voting for yourself.
You love this country? You're proud of it? You have opportunity here unlike anywhere else? Well then, pay your way. Quit freeloading. Quit asking for the welfare that you resent when it's given to people who haven't had your opportunities.
My feelings about whiney conservatives and Republicans aren't getting any more positive, I'm sorry to say. I respect people who work hard and understand the support they've been given, and are proud to pay their way.
I'm getting really impatient with this blindness.
I'm in or near the top level of income in this country, the level that might have taxes raised. I have always worked hard for every nickel I earned, and as a single parent since my kids were babies, proudly provided for my family. I went from being broke to being okay, becoming comfortable. But what's this about taxes?
I am, you are or will be, successful bcz of free schools&teachers, roads & bridges, our military, you know the rest. People who scratch by can't pay. I know. I was one of them. Because I got the benefits of being an American citizen, and because of the graduated income tax, I stopped scratching by. Now, I can afford to pay my way.
And I want to. Thank you, America.
No, I'm not rich. My taxes might not change at all. But if I get more successful, and I might, I'll happily pull out that checkbook and pay my taxes.
Those are my roads and bridges and rivers and that's my air. Those people hurt by Katrina, fighting overseas, are my countrymen.
I'm sick of corporate welfare and theft, the military industrial lobbyist corporate complex bleeding us white -- and I'm sick of the people who back up that corruption selling the lie that you 'should hang on to what you work hard for,' when they're really trying to get you to vote for them -- and you're foolish enough to think you're voting for yourself.
You love this country? You're proud of it? You have opportunity here unlike anywhere else? Well then, pay your way. Quit freeloading. Quit asking for the welfare that you resent when it's given to people who haven't had your opportunities.
My feelings about whiney conservatives and Republicans aren't getting any more positive, I'm sorry to say. I respect people who work hard and understand the support they've been given, and are proud to pay their way.
Monday, November 3, 2008
Revenge!
From EF:
Rove. He should be made to be a low-paid teacher with the Head Start program he'd like to have eliminated. Or work in a women's shelter or homeless shelter - and have to live on the premises!!!! Any good?
Yes, good!!! Very good. I'm almost smiling again!
More: Lock Rove up in a small room with Joe Wolfewitz, a comb, and no water. Gag.
Rove. He should be made to be a low-paid teacher with the Head Start program he'd like to have eliminated. Or work in a women's shelter or homeless shelter - and have to live on the premises!!!! Any good?
Yes, good!!! Very good. I'm almost smiling again!
More: Lock Rove up in a small room with Joe Wolfewitz, a comb, and no water. Gag.
Greg Palast, leave me alone!
I can't stand the truth. It's killing me. If you hate it too, just go down to the post before this one, the funny one, and don't read this thing that just showed up in my inbox:
Here's an ugly little secret about American democracy: We don't count all the votes. In 2004, based on the data from the US Elections Assistance Commission, 3,006,080 votes were not counted: "spoiled," unreadable and blank ballots; "provisional" ballots rejected; mail-in ballots disqualified.
This Tuesday, it will be worse. Much worse.
That's what I found while traveling the nation over the last year for BBC Television and Rolling Stone Magazine, working with voting rights attorney Robert F. Kennedy Jr. This we guarantee: there will be far more votes disappeared by Tuesday night than the three million lost in 2004. A six-million vote swipe, quite likely, shifts 4 percent of the ballots, within the margin of error of the tightest polls.
Begin with this harsh statistic: since the last election, more than ten million voters have been purged from the nation's vote registries. And that's just the start of the steal.
If the noncount were random, it wouldn't matter. But it's not random. A US Civil Rights Commission analysis shows that the chance a black voter's ballot will "spoil" or be blank is 900 percent higher than a white voter's.
Does that mean the election's stolen and you should forget voting and just go back to bed for four years? Hell, no. It means you vote and vote smart, learn how to pry their filthy little hands off your ballot (there's a link at the end).
Read the rest exclusively at Truthout.org
Here's an ugly little secret about American democracy: We don't count all the votes. In 2004, based on the data from the US Elections Assistance Commission, 3,006,080 votes were not counted: "spoiled," unreadable and blank ballots; "provisional" ballots rejected; mail-in ballots disqualified.
This Tuesday, it will be worse. Much worse.
That's what I found while traveling the nation over the last year for BBC Television and Rolling Stone Magazine, working with voting rights attorney Robert F. Kennedy Jr. This we guarantee: there will be far more votes disappeared by Tuesday night than the three million lost in 2004. A six-million vote swipe, quite likely, shifts 4 percent of the ballots, within the margin of error of the tightest polls.
Begin with this harsh statistic: since the last election, more than ten million voters have been purged from the nation's vote registries. And that's just the start of the steal.
If the noncount were random, it wouldn't matter. But it's not random. A US Civil Rights Commission analysis shows that the chance a black voter's ballot will "spoil" or be blank is 900 percent higher than a white voter's.
Does that mean the election's stolen and you should forget voting and just go back to bed for four years? Hell, no. It means you vote and vote smart, learn how to pry their filthy little hands off your ballot (there's a link at the end).
Read the rest exclusively at Truthout.org
I want revenge.
I shouldn't listen to McCain or Palin on TV, or any of their people either. I'm sure Obama will win. But I'm also sure he'll be attacked worse than Clinton was from the first day, probably before he's even in office. And I'm sure Bush will succeed in loosening regulations to protect us against arsenic in the water, pollution, and everything else you can name, and do it more than 30 days before inauguration so it will be hard to undo. And that Obama won't be able to please the people who voted him in on every count.
But I intend to continue fighting for him even after he's in office, to give him every chance to do what he's capable of doing. I have a hunch a lot of people will be joining me in answering his critics whenever they're unfair, as fast as we do now.
I'm exhausted. Stressed out. I want this to be over. I want a landslide so big that the mainstream media starts sucking up to Obama. I want to watch the haters like Limbaugh and Crystal and O'Reilly and those ghastly women announcers whose names I don't even remember, Malkin, Coulter, who else? all of them, I want to see them wither because no one's listening to them but the weirdest of the weird -- I want to see them bubble up as they shriek their frustration, like the Wizard of Oz's wicked witch of the whatever. I want the super right wing Christians to have to go to picnics with Neo-Nazis and skinheads because they don't have any other friends. I want their daughters to marry skinheads and make these intolerant 'Christians' ride behind them on their motorcycles or else they have to stay home. I want skinheads to go to Christian colleges and sit in the classes and swear at the teachers.
Oh my, I need a good laugh. Please help me think of other wonderful pictures:
How about Palin on a very small island with Dick Cheney and no computer, no cell phones, no faxes, just each other. Oh, how lovely that would be. They would hate each other so much.
How about Bush in a Christian Summer Camp made to read the bible, and having to testify to the Lord he says he believes in, every day, day after day after day after day, and unable to get anything alchoholic to drink.
Rove, Rove, where do we want to see that slimy, evil, ethics-free creep? Give me something deft, something clever, something he'd really really hate.
But I intend to continue fighting for him even after he's in office, to give him every chance to do what he's capable of doing. I have a hunch a lot of people will be joining me in answering his critics whenever they're unfair, as fast as we do now.
I'm exhausted. Stressed out. I want this to be over. I want a landslide so big that the mainstream media starts sucking up to Obama. I want to watch the haters like Limbaugh and Crystal and O'Reilly and those ghastly women announcers whose names I don't even remember, Malkin, Coulter, who else? all of them, I want to see them wither because no one's listening to them but the weirdest of the weird -- I want to see them bubble up as they shriek their frustration, like the Wizard of Oz's wicked witch of the whatever. I want the super right wing Christians to have to go to picnics with Neo-Nazis and skinheads because they don't have any other friends. I want their daughters to marry skinheads and make these intolerant 'Christians' ride behind them on their motorcycles or else they have to stay home. I want skinheads to go to Christian colleges and sit in the classes and swear at the teachers.
Oh my, I need a good laugh. Please help me think of other wonderful pictures:
How about Palin on a very small island with Dick Cheney and no computer, no cell phones, no faxes, just each other. Oh, how lovely that would be. They would hate each other so much.
How about Bush in a Christian Summer Camp made to read the bible, and having to testify to the Lord he says he believes in, every day, day after day after day after day, and unable to get anything alchoholic to drink.
Rove, Rove, where do we want to see that slimy, evil, ethics-free creep? Give me something deft, something clever, something he'd really really hate.
Sunday, November 2, 2008
A story about Joe Conservative
An acquaintance sent this. Pretty good.
Joe gets up at 6 a.m. and fills his coffeepot with water to prepare his morning coffee. The water is clean and good because some tree-hugging liberal fought for minimum water-quality standards.
With his first swallow of water, he takes his daily medication. His medications are safe to take because some stupid commie liberal fought to ensure their safety and that they work as advertised.
All but $10 of his medications are paid for by his employer's medical plan because some liberal union workers fought their employers for paid medical insurance - now Joe gets it, too.
He prepares his morning breakfast--bacon and eggs. Joe's bacon is safe to eat because some girly-man liberal fought for laws to regulate the meat packing industry.
In the morning shower, Joe reaches for his shampoo. His bottle is properly labeled with each ingredient and its amount in the total contents, because some crybaby liberal fought for his right to know what he was putting on his body.
Joe dresses, walks outside and takes a deep breath. The air he breathes is clean because some environmentalist wacko liberal fought for the laws to stop industries from polluting our air. He walks on the government-provided sidewalk to the subway station for his government-subsidized ride to work. It saves him considerable money in parking and transportation fees because some fancy-pants liberal fought for affordable public transportation, which gives everyone the opportunity to be a conributor.
Joe begins his work day. He has a good job with excellent pay, medical benefits, retirement, paid holidays and vacation because some lazy, liberal union members fought and died for these working standards.
Joe's employer pays these standards because Joe's employer doesn't want his employees to call the union. If Joe is hurt on the job or becomes unemployed, he'll get a worker compensation or unemployment check because some stupid liberal didn't think he should lose his home because of his temporary misfortune. It is noon time and Joe needs to make a bank deposit so he can pay some bills. Joe's deposit is federally insured by the FDIC because some godless liberal wanted to protect Joe's money from unscrupulous bankers who ruined the banking system before the Great Depression.
Joe has to pay his below-market federal student loan because some elitist liberal decided that Joe and the government would be better off if he was educated and earned more money over his lifetime. Joe also forgets that in addition to his federally subsidized student loans, he attended a state-funded university.
Joe is home from work. He plans to visit his father this evening at his farm home in the country. He gets in his car for the drive. His car is among the safest in the world because some America-hating liberal fought for car safety standards to go along with the tax-payer funded roads. He arrives at his boyhood home.
His was the third generation to live in the house financed by Farmers' Home Administration because bankers didn't want to make rural loans. The house didn't have electricity until some big-government liberal stuck his nose where it didn't belong and demanded rural electrification.
He is happy to see his father, who is now retired. His father lives on Social Security and a union pension because some wine-drinking, cheese-eating liberal made sure he could take care of himself so Joe wouldn't have to.
Joe gets back in his car for the ride home, and turns on a radio talk show. The radio host keeps saying that liberals are bad and conservatives are good. He doesn't mention that the beloved Republicans have fought against every protection and benefit Joe enjoys throughout his day.
Joe agrees: "We don't need those big-government liberals ruining our lives! After all, I'm a self-made man who believes everyone should take care of themselves just like I have."
Joe gets up at 6 a.m. and fills his coffeepot with water to prepare his morning coffee. The water is clean and good because some tree-hugging liberal fought for minimum water-quality standards.
With his first swallow of water, he takes his daily medication. His medications are safe to take because some stupid commie liberal fought to ensure their safety and that they work as advertised.
All but $10 of his medications are paid for by his employer's medical plan because some liberal union workers fought their employers for paid medical insurance - now Joe gets it, too.
He prepares his morning breakfast--bacon and eggs. Joe's bacon is safe to eat because some girly-man liberal fought for laws to regulate the meat packing industry.
In the morning shower, Joe reaches for his shampoo. His bottle is properly labeled with each ingredient and its amount in the total contents, because some crybaby liberal fought for his right to know what he was putting on his body.
Joe dresses, walks outside and takes a deep breath. The air he breathes is clean because some environmentalist wacko liberal fought for the laws to stop industries from polluting our air. He walks on the government-provided sidewalk to the subway station for his government-subsidized ride to work. It saves him considerable money in parking and transportation fees because some fancy-pants liberal fought for affordable public transportation, which gives everyone the opportunity to be a conributor.
Joe begins his work day. He has a good job with excellent pay, medical benefits, retirement, paid holidays and vacation because some lazy, liberal union members fought and died for these working standards.
Joe's employer pays these standards because Joe's employer doesn't want his employees to call the union. If Joe is hurt on the job or becomes unemployed, he'll get a worker compensation or unemployment check because some stupid liberal didn't think he should lose his home because of his temporary misfortune. It is noon time and Joe needs to make a bank deposit so he can pay some bills. Joe's deposit is federally insured by the FDIC because some godless liberal wanted to protect Joe's money from unscrupulous bankers who ruined the banking system before the Great Depression.
Joe has to pay his below-market federal student loan because some elitist liberal decided that Joe and the government would be better off if he was educated and earned more money over his lifetime. Joe also forgets that in addition to his federally subsidized student loans, he attended a state-funded university.
Joe is home from work. He plans to visit his father this evening at his farm home in the country. He gets in his car for the drive. His car is among the safest in the world because some America-hating liberal fought for car safety standards to go along with the tax-payer funded roads. He arrives at his boyhood home.
His was the third generation to live in the house financed by Farmers' Home Administration because bankers didn't want to make rural loans. The house didn't have electricity until some big-government liberal stuck his nose where it didn't belong and demanded rural electrification.
He is happy to see his father, who is now retired. His father lives on Social Security and a union pension because some wine-drinking, cheese-eating liberal made sure he could take care of himself so Joe wouldn't have to.
Joe gets back in his car for the ride home, and turns on a radio talk show. The radio host keeps saying that liberals are bad and conservatives are good. He doesn't mention that the beloved Republicans have fought against every protection and benefit Joe enjoys throughout his day.
Joe agrees: "We don't need those big-government liberals ruining our lives! After all, I'm a self-made man who believes everyone should take care of themselves just like I have."
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